Why Do Some People Think "Erotic" is a Four-Letter Word?

Eroticism is a quality that causes sexual feelings, as well as a philosophical contemplation concerning the aesthetics of sexual desire, sensuality and romantic love...

I call myself an erotic romance author. I call myself a lot of things. Just look at my bio! I'm a blogger, a poet, a writer, a dancer...and in all of it, I see the erotic, the sensual. When someone tells me they don't like "erotic" writing, I wonder what they mean exactly. My first reaction is to scream: "What? Should I check your pulse? Are you alive? Are you breathing?" Because for me, the erotic is as natural as drinking water. Sometimes we sip it. Sometimes we gulp it. Sometimes we devour it. And yes, sometimes we can choke on it. Without it, I doubt a person is truly living life fully if they can't find beauty in the eroticism of being a human being with needs and desires that are basic and instinctual. Why deny ourselves who we are? 

What I realize is that those who say they don't like THAT kind of writing (and it happens to me ALL THE TIME and did so yesterday), is that they must be thinking of something I am not at all thinking about, i.e. we are not on the same page in the Merriam-Webster dictionary. To be human, we are sexual. And things in the world around us are beautifully erotic. I think we've been taught that embracing the erotic is bad for some reason. If you don't have erotic impulses, forgive me, I feel bad for you. It may be time to go see your doctor. 

And sex is only one part of it. Some sex, frankly, isn't even all that erotic at all. So, I'm certain my definition must be different. A painting can be erotic. Beautiful photography can be. Love-making and sex can be. Dancing, yes, can be. And writing, to me, without any sense of eroticism, is down-right dull. I am hard-pressed to think of any novels I adored once I passed puberty that don't have elements of eroticism in it, not romance, eroticism. I mean that.

"Erotic" is not a four-letter word that needs to be chopped up on some uptight, sanitized cutting board. We read for the human condition. Life is messy. Life isn't linear. Life isn't black and white. And without eroticism in our lives, we are not whole. We feel lost. Alone. Maybe even depressed. Love and lust and sex is all part of living fully; it is all part of feeling, discovering, and exploring the truth of who we are. For every Christian who blames Eve and temptation, I'd bet a million dollars she'd do it all over again. "I don't like erotic writing." Uh-huh. Sure. No, you just don't want anyone to know. And I used to live a life like that, hiding who I was.

I have no idea how we change the conversation. But when we do, I do hope it includes the erotic. After all, EROTIC is not a four-letter word but a six-letter one. ;)