Do you believe intuition really exists? Some days I do. Somedays I don’t. Even as I write this I’m all over the map! But I think I’ve discovered something about it. We tend to wish it away when it doesn’t suit us. We get into relationships or do things we knew we shouldn’t have, do it anyway, and then put out blame. If we had just listened from the get-go to our gut, we would see that. Ever ask yourself why you can’t open up fully to someone, even after a very long time? We usually say: “Oh, that’s just how I am. I don’t open easily. It takes me a long time to trust.” But those are excuses we use. We know damn well why we don’t. Whether we’ve been burned before or not, those of us who do take our time, discover just why we didn’t open to that person. The truth eventually presents itself. I’m slowly coming to that realization. Maybe it’s that the person shows brief moments of the person they really are early on but quickly put the mask back up, and we accept that. We see what we want. We see what we hope is there oftentimes, not what is really there. So my advice you didn’t ask for: Never make excuses for the way you behave or feel. There is a reason. And that reason is usually, if not always, correct.
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Question: In light of what happened, sadly, to Notre Dame, my question today asks:
Should writers use real places and things in their novels or will it date it? In wake of the tragedy of Notre Dame. My book "Edge of Torment" takes place partially there, on the banks of the Seine...and I'm reminded of a passage: "We found a spot on the south side of the river, with a spectacular view of Notre Dame. I couldn’t help but notice the ominous look of it with the gray color and gargoyles. Still, something about it, the stained-glass windows and overall grandeur of the building and its architecture, perhaps, put into perspective my life. I needed to be in the moment. Embrace why I had come to Paris in the first place. That my problems were pretty mundane and insignificant juxtaposed next to the history surrounding me. I was but a speck, and I laughed, thinking about Dr. Seuss. “A person’s a person no matter how small.” This couldn't be more true today. :( But should I remove it from the story? It is mentioned a total of four times in the novel, which some of you may have already read, and it is a romantic element in the story. I could write a little foreword and update the novel, take it out altogether, or just leave things the way there are. What say you? I'm inclined to say: Some things are meant to simply stay preserved, like a memory, exactly as we want it to be. The story of Annabelle and Michael will change...and so, too, does history. But our fiction doesn't have to. Because, after all, isn't that what reading is for? Edge of Torment https://buff.ly/2Uk0ql8 I was asked a question yesterday that I thought would be so easy to answer: If I woke up as the opposite sex, what would be the first thing I would want to do? For a moment, traditional ideas of careers and roles popped into my head. And I shook my head. "No. No. No." That is no longer true! I exclaimed to myself. Then the even more obvious answers jumped into my head: run around with no shirt, grow a beard, pee standing up, kiss a girl, make a girl climax perfectly, sing baritone, and on and on. But besides growing a beard (which frankly, I wouldn’t really care to), there is absolutely NOTHING I cannot do as a woman if I want to. And that was a revelation. Gender roles are no longer stuffed into tight, tiny boxes like pointe shoes. And I’m proud of the progress humanity is making. Being the opposite sex, however, for a day, would certainly enlighten us and give us more empathy towards one another. We still hear how unequal our world is when it comes to gender equality. But frankly, I, personally, don’t feel that way. I don’t think I’ve ever truly felt that way, even with a mother who wished it so. I not only enjoy being a woman, but further, there is absolutely nothing I can’t do if I want to work at it. I truly believe that. And in a society now being open more and more to sexual identity and gender reversals, I can kiss a girl any damn time I want! (I should probably get on that! 😊 ). But seriously, I can do any of those things I listed above if I wanted to. It may be that I’m older and really don’t give a fuck what people think much anymore. But those days of “I’m just a girl” are long gone. Even science doesn’t hold us back physically from doing anything we have a desire to do. And I’m happy for it. Both men and women have societal pressures: Women to be pretty; men to be masculine and stoic, for example. But it’s ever-changing and hardly anyone is blinking an eye anymore, at least in the world in which I live. Do I pretend there isn’t a whole country out there where pockets exist of absolute closed-minded, traditional and unsubstantiated thought? Of course I don’t. But we are changing it. Televisions shows, like Billionaires or example, have characters we adore and fight for, who identify as “they”; more and more women are running in races for politics; sports have opened up for women in anything they choose to do; and no more are the days where “Anon” or “George” must be signed to any writing we women do. I like my femininity. I love my career. I love being with a man who knows how. And frankly, if I could wake up and be the other gender, I’d say, okay, maybe for a day, just to put the shoe on the other foot. In fact, a man would learn a great deal about what it’s like to be a woman as well. It would be a lesson in understanding and tolerance and it could benefit all of us tremendously. The outcome would be that we might finally understand that we are all just human beings. We could all benefit from is a healthy dose of empathy. But I don’t need a penis to understand that.
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I LOVE to write and read. I particularly enjoy reading erotic romance that has tons of emotion in it. I hope you will ask me questions and share your favorite authors and novels. I welcome all feedback.
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November 2022
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